Let me tell you something.  I HATE self care…. or at least I thought I did.  The idea of self care was introduced to me when I first entered therapy over a decade ago and I dismissed it without a second thought. “I don’t need self care,” I would say to myself. ” It isn’t important, it’s indulgent, I don’t deserve it, and it certainly won’t help.”  This was my stance for years and years as I refused to do it whenever suggested.

"None of my actions were a choice - they were an illness, a coping mechanism that allowed me to disguise my insecurities, pain, trauma, self-hate, and complete belief that I was not enough, that I would never be enough." 

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                                                                 Image Credit: UnSplash

Originally posted on Ravishly.

Frequently, I get messages from people – usually cis men who are dating cis women, but not always – asking me what the hell they’re supposed to do when their partner talks negatively about their own body.

“She’s unhappily gained weight since we’ve been together, and I know saying ‘I still think you’re beautiful’ confirms the idea that fat is bad,” they say.